oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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