Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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