I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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