we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
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i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
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Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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