we have officially lost it.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
