Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
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