Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
