we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
