If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize