Well douche your snatch and let's go!
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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