Dual....:-)
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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