Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Randomize