Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Randomize
