Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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