3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize