Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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