Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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