Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
