My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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