God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
