So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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