how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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