she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
