I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
