somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
My penis needs a shock collar
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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