I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
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