I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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