i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize
