i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Randomize
