She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Randomize
