pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Randomize