I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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