I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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