I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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