I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
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want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
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Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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