Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I faked an abortion last night.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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