Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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