this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
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