We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
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