i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize