ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
