Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
