not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Houston, we have a squirter
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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