You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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