you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
