worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
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i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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