i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
