did you get engaged???
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Never joke about your clitoris.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
