You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
