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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I came so hard my ears popped.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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