Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(416): View more from Ontario

I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey

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(609): View more from New Jersey

He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone

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(216): View more from Ohio

For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;

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(954): View more from Florida

I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(415): View more from California

It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.

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(520): View more from Arizona

We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.

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(248): View more from Michigan

So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night

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(301): View more from Maryland

Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.

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