i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online