I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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